Organ Donor

So as my title of this blog suggests, my favorite track on the record was "Organ Donor". I have a soft spot for the piano and the organ, as I play both. I grew up playing the piano, I played for 13 years, and I played only classical music. My teacher was a very gifted old woman who only let me play from her ancient sheets of Chopin, Beethoven, and Burgmuller. By the time I was 18, I had had enough classical music. I quite lessons and competing in the Certificate of Merit, simply so I could just play what I wanted to play. I don't regret this decision, but I don't regret my training as a classical artist as well. The track "Organ Donor" has some elements and timing of some of my favorite classical pieces, while using new and modern tech-no trends. The sound of the organ is very spooky and at the same time has a very old and ancient sound (primarily because it was the main instrument used for catholic churches).

I think that the entire album has a very unique and different sound to it. I love when artists mix their tracks, without making them repetitive and boring. I really enjoyed listening to his style. He reminds me of another artist that also does something similar, but not quite as broad. His name is GirlTalk. He is another DJ who mixes different types of music together to make new tracks (old hits with new ones/ classical with hip hop/ etc). I am posting a link to some of his music so anybody can hear him who never has, he is very fun to listen to. I also think it is interesting that DJ Shadow calls himself.. DJ Shadow. Considering we are really diving in Plato and the Cave... Coincidence?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6TuMhYg89E

this is a link to my favorite Girl Talk song...

The Breakfast Club.. and a genius..

So, I posted this blog awhile ago on my other site.. so I decided to re-post it here since my movie is "The Breakfast Club". It seriously is one of the greatest movies of all time...

This is a tribute to John Hughes. Whether you know it or not, you have been influenced by his magic. We all grew up watching his movies, and quoting his witty banter. My personal favorite movie of ALL TIME is The Breakfast Club and I could quote it beginning to end. John wrote and directed most of the cult classics we know and love including: Sixteen Candles, Ferris Buellers Day Off, Weird Science, Home Alone, Uncle Buck, The "Vacation" movies, Pretty in Pink, The Great Outdoors, and Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. For some weird reason, Mr. Hughes was able to capture all the important aspects of high school life. I know for a fact that high school never changes. The same cliques exist , and the same heartbreaks happen, and the "breakfast club" has been retold through the years with a different spin. Everyone knows that if they had a "duck man" in their lives the world would be a much happier place, and if Jake Ryan really did pull up in a hot rod wanting "you" you would melt. Unfortunately we all are aware that high school was a pretty shitty place, and watching movies like this only made you believe high school was something else. However, watching Ferris sing "Danke Schoen" on a float in Chicago on a Friday night was a staple in my young life. Watching these scenes now only brings back the memories of high school, and how young we were. So thank you John Hughes for making the 80's fabulous, and making our expectations of high school so high. RIP John.

"Not that I condone fascism, or any 'ism' for that matter. Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon: 'I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me.' Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus, I'd still have to bum rides off of people. "- Ferris Bueller

"Dear Mr. Vernon, We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong, but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us: in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain ... and an athlete ... and a basket case ... a princess ... and a criminal. Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNGIg8f-0Wc&feature=related

The Catalyst for Change

We all know that it takes a long time to be able to change. It also depends on the kind of change we want to make. The more we realize about ourselves, the more we accept the reality of our own character. Phil is a person we never had the opportunity to really realize who he was or what he wanted out of his life. He had an idea of his life that was not the truth, but in fact a huge lie about who he really was. When Phil gets stuck in the ellipsis of groundhog day, he goes through many phases of discovering his personal truth. Without this phenomenon of the repetition though, he never would have been able to see himself as he truly was.

The groundhogs day was a catalyst for change. He resented it, hated it, and then eventually accepted it, and that was when everything began to change for him. This is true for many things in our own lives that we might not realize are a catalyst for change. When someone tells you to be open to the world and experience things that are new and different, sometimes we scoff or don't pay attention because we are afraid of change. The things we resent and don't understand are often the things that makes us who we are. The groundhog day is like "The Cave" in so many ways, but mostly it represents the idea that we are all learning how to be the best person we can be. Sometimes this can take a lifetime, and it might be a lifetime we hate, but in the end we are left with something true. Something that we can be proud to know we found for ourselves, and something that no one can take from you.

Fear of the Light

The analogy of Plato's Cave is a very good example of life in general. Since we are always looking for "the truth", it can apply to almost anything we do or struggle with. However, sometimes the truth can be a scary thing, and dealing with it is not as easy as walking into the bright light and seeing the error of your ways. It look me almost 14 years to realize this.

When I was seven I was diagnosed with Type 1 Insulin Dependent Diabetes. This is a completely different disease than type 2, which a lot of grandparents and older people have. I do not and have not ever taken pills for my diabetes. Type 2's have used so much insulin in their body that the pancreas becomes immune to the insulin, and therefore taking the pill will help produce the enzyme that recognizes and reacts to the already produced insulin. My pancreas, and all other type 1's, do not make insulin at all. The scientific world does not know why this happens. There is a trigger, but they don't know what it is yet.

In order to maintain my life and survive. I had to give myself shots at least 5 times a day, and check my blood sugar regularly, monitor everything I ate so I could give the appropriate amount of insulin, monitor my exercise regime so I didn't go low and get sick, and carry around a med kit with me everywhere I went. At the age of seven, this was not my idea of having fun. I had to learn how to take care of myself at a much earlier age, which is something some adults can't even do. My parents were great, and they tried to help as best they could, but you can't explain a disease to someone unless they know what it feels like, and they didn't. I went through a lot of struggles at a young age, but pretty soon my diabetes became a part of me and everything I did. It was like remembering to wash your hands after going to the bathroom, simply instinct.

The older I became, the easier it was to not care about myself. Diabetes was pushed to the back of mind, when it should have been on the front. I would go days without checking my blood sugar, and I felt awful all the time. I was tired of having to deal with this "problem" that no one else I knew had to deal with. Because I was so negligent, I was hindered by my diabetes. I would get really sick on the basketball court and have to sit out at games and practices, I couldn't focus on my work in school because my vision was blurry from high blood sugar, my body was spilling ketones (sugar in the urine) because I wasn't taking my insulin and causing heavy doses of fatigue, I did not feel good.

My starting point (exiting the cave), came when I was 17. After 2 hours of basketball practice, no food, and my disregard from checking my blood sugar, I had a seizure. My parents and brother were gone for the night at a banquet and I was home all by myself. My parents came home and found me on the kitchen floor. Diabetics have this large syringe full of glucose called glucagon, which provides a signal to the liver to produce straight glucose sugar into the blood stream to get to the brain. They don't know how long I was unconscious, but the glucagon worked. I had to go the the hospital, they put me on a glucagon drip, and I had to stay there. It was awful.

After that day I realized that I was living in a cave, the shadows were the difficulties that diabetes contributed to my life. I didn't want to see the truth about my health. I was convinced that I would be fine, and nothing would happen to me. I wanted to be just like everyone else and just eat ice cream at the mall, or carry a tiny purse (not a backpack full of syringes and food), I didn't want to have to go into a stall in the bathroom and give myself a shot in the stomach so I could eat nachos with my friends. I was embarrassed and self conscious, just like every teenager. The puppeteers were the dreams of teenage normalcy, I would even consider myself a puppeteer. I was convincing myself I would be OK if I ignored my body and abused myself. But the truth was that in order to live a healthy life, and a long life, I had to start getting serious about taking care of myself. Diabetes comes with a lot of complications later on in life, in order to avoid them and even get that far, I had to start now.

I escaped the cave by a scary life experience, and stayed on the path to truth because of that fear. I am still afraid. This is why I say the truth can be scary, the fear drives me to take care of myself. Sometimes it is hard to live like that, but then I remember that right now I am healthy, and I am doing everything I can to stay that way. It was hard to do it alone, to constantly remember all the things I had to remember, but I learned how to deal with my frustrations and move on. I went to work at a summer camp for kids with diabetes and their families. I met some of the most amazing people there, people who knew what it felt like, could relate to me. It was the best thing I could have ever done. This really helped adjust my eyes to the light. I know that what we go through every day is challenging and unfair, but we do it because we want to be healthy and happy.

The moral of my story is convincing yourself that everything will be OK and turn out the way you expect it to will only work if you are courageous enough to look life in the face and stand up to it. It can be scary and hurtful, but seeing reality and taking responsibility for your own self is the only way to see the truth.